A Gift

I always thought that a gift was something you gave to someone coming directly from your heart. It does not need to be big or expensive. It does not need to impress. What counts most is the intention with which it is given.

There are so many false "gifts". Blood gifts I call them. They are there for bribery, for purposely hurting other people present who cannot affort to give an expensive gift for example, they are given with the intention of getting something in return, they are given with a special purpose that only usually reveals itself after a while.

Those gifts I a rather not get. And I am telling you all honestly..I will no longer except such gifts . That is a promise I made to myself. If I have the slightest inclination that a gift is offered with a purpose, I will politely declne to accept.

Perhaps you are thinking now why I am taking this negative posture. Well it is very simple. I recently discovered that I have received a lot of "blood gifts" throughout the years. How do you discover such a thing...well very simple. When the givers in question throw it in your face that they have given you such and such gifts or when you are even asked to give gifts back, well let me tell you, your world trembles on its foundations.

I can also tell you that I returned those gifts immediately. I don't want blood on my hands, I don't want falseness around me anymore. I have had enough falseness and lies around me for more then 20 years. And I am no longer putting up with that sort of shit. 

Slowly but surely I am finding out about a lot of lies that were being told to me , especially by my ex-husband. They are all surfacing one way or the other now. It is really weird that in a small village like Almancil, based on gossip, that those things never reached my ears before now. But now I get hit....blow after blow. And unfortunately it still hurts immensely.

I could never have imagined he was such a liar, such a player, and that I was such a stupid woman to believe all of his lies. The biggest lie of all ...???? The one where he claimed that he loved me! And that is the lie that cuts the deepest, because i lived it for 21 years.

And still he lies, connives, and plots his revenge. His revenge for my audacity to leave him. And he uses the lowest weapons he can use. He is a coward, a beast. I cannot imagine that you would go so low to hurt someone and even get a kick out of it, which he does.

One thing I know for sure...he is a very unhappy, sad, pathetic little person, who will search for happiness the rest of his life.




gek hé Crisje dar zulke mensen bestaan en dat dan nog ooit zijn vrouw was ????


Gepost door: viv | 11-04-09

heel aangrijpend ... Ben hier altijd blijven komen en lezen, nooit gereageerd, maar deze post heeft me toch erg aangegrepen ...

ps : CD van Cold Play staat nog heel vaak op ;-)

Gepost door: Bikerke | 20-04-09

x hier is het ook stillekes :-)

Gepost door: Viv | 11-06-09

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Gepost door: DaymnsandDath | 13-07-10

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